going solo.

Now before I go ahead and do the copy/paste shit from facebook, for the last part of the Russia trip, I figured I'd write down why I travelled alone, and my experiences.

Firstly, why?

Very simply, because noone else wanted to/had the time to come along, and I wanted to go. I had done this before, on a smaller scale, while wandering about in Dublin for two days, so actually planning to head to Russia alone was a decision that didn't come easy. The going part was easy, because of the wedding, but finding someone to go with me wasn't. This was proven when I failed at convincing anyone to come along, and went ahead on my own anyway.

Without going further into details, traveling solo does have it's pros and cons. I hope what I'm writing doesn't come across as thoughtcatalog-ish bullshit designed to make you think you are some pseudo-philosopher (which MIGHT happen) but anyway, I'll try to make this as intelligible as I can.

Being alone is scary, especially in my case this time. I was in a totally new environment and illiterate. There are signs, but none of them help, because even the alphabets used are different. The only phrases I know are "hello, how are you" and "you are very beautiful" (which I learned so that it would be helpful in social situations. It wasn't.) I was basically helpless and vulnerable (But I watched the Ameri-do-te videos by Master Ken so I can fight). Yet this feeling of helplessness was also what gave me the excitement of travel, a little fizzy feeling behind the testes (as James May would say), and when I needed help, I had to ask for it. I had to trust that the person I was asking would not turn me over and rob me, and on one occasion, this trust made me 10,000 rubles poorer. But this is all part of the experience, and while I'd rather not have been cheated/robbed, something like that could easily happen even if I wasn't alone.

There was also occasional feelings of "I wish someone could see this with me", but I got over that really quickly. It was not a problem in Rostov, because I went for a wedding, and was among friends, but a good way to get over this was going for free walking tours. Inevitably, there will be someone else traveling solo, and boom - instant new travel buddies. You might or might not become friends, but I managed to stay in contact with a couple of my travel buddies, and now have new places added to my to-go list, which is really just expanding at an uncontrollable rate.

This next point is really only half relevant, because when I travel with friends, we usually do what we want anyway, and go together on activities we all want to do. But when I was alone, I had the freedom to do whatever the fuck I liked, be it sleep in until 4pm (day after the wedding, because 1.5 bottles of vodka is not a joke), or stay out drinking, or going to places that I felt like seeing.

Of course, conversely, if you are the type to get lost on a straight road (like I could be), then you'll miss out many of the things you wanted to see (like I did). The good thing is that usually, you'll end up elsewhere, because when you're going somewhere, you'll always end up somewhere. It might not be where you intended to go, but it is somewhere you end up. And this somewhere could be really cool. In fact, getting lost is one of my favourite things to happen on a holiday, provided I eventually un-lose myself.

My senses also became extra perceptive, and I had all the time in the world (not really no, I have a train to catch at 07:00 and I'm LAAAAAATEEEE!) to think about all the things that happened, what I'm seeing, and make tenuous connections because humans cannot accept that sometimes things just happen. Anyway, I do keep a journal, and I find myself making a lot more observations in my journal when I'm alone.

I have a feeling this post is not going well. It's fucking aimless. Kind of like the way I am going solo ha.

Edit: Because it makes me feel alive. All the above is just nonsense.